The Art Of Forgiveness

I think that we have all been in that space where someone has hurt us and what we want more than ever is for them to feel the same hurt in return. As humans, forgiveness is one of the hardest things to do. It is so easy to feel angry and to want revenge but to actually forgive someone takes work.

This past Sunday, I went to church and heard a powerful message by Dr. Robi Sonderegger on forgiveness. This message resonated with me because forgiveness is something that I strive to work on daily through my growth as a person. Dr. Robi talked about what forgiveness is and what it is not -- which gave me a better understanding on the importance of truly being a forgiving person.

I thought that it would only be right to pass on what I learned about forgiveness!

What is forgiveness?

  1. Making a choice - forgiveness is making a choice to move on. Make a choice to put it down and let it go! Forgiveness takes place in an instant but healing happens over time.  
  2. Sacrifice - we sacrifice our right to take revenge when we forgive someone.
  3. Trust - we have to trust that the situation will be handled. Karma is real, ya'll.
  4. Gift - forgiveness is a gift! 

At the end of the day, forgiveness has very little to do with the perpetrator and everything to do with your heart.

What forgiveness is NOT:

  1. Forgiveness is NOT making an excuse or excusing the perpetrator!
  2. Forgiveness does NOT require us to befriend the perpetrator.
  3. Forgiveness does NOT require us to keep being abused by the perpetrator.
  4. Forgiveness does NOT require us to forget what happened.

What's interesting to me is that society has conditioned us to think that we should 'forgive and forget' but I think that we should never forget or turn a blind eye to what someone did to us. 

Forgiveness is key, especially if you want to grow to your optimum potential. However, you should always be aware of the actions of the people around you and remember that you must first love yourself!